Well it can be – or it should be. I’ve written about Identity – uncovering that naked/truest self to be ‘FIT’ and balanced. But what are those relationships and what is symbiosis (unless of of course you watched Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and the symbiont).
Individual identity is enhanced and grown through relationships and the environment/community you are in.
Of course (?) Identity is uncovered where needs are met – and covered tight where relationships create a fear-inducing environment.
Like most of us, I’ve always thought of relationship categories: family, friends, lovers, colleagues, acquaintances, etc. When I started working on Learning From Mother Nature , I broadened my thoughts of human interactions to Four Key Relationships:
Four key relations that enhance or detract my ‘FIT’ and meet or don’t meet my needs:
Self
Others
Environment
Economy
Throwing the idea of ‘FIT’ and (Maslow’s) needs into the mix it gets complicated and fun. It’s simpler to understand Human Nature through Mother Nature (I’m biased obviously) so, I turned to her definition of relationships: Symbiosis.
Mutualistic and parasitic are the main Symbiosis; here’s a look at the three main ones:
It’s as if Mother Nature defines relationship based on the result or outcome (win – lose – or some combination) of the interaction – whether it’s intended or not!
Interestingly, it’s probably parasitism that’s most known.
Learning from Mother Nature acknowledges all relationships. Take it slowly: Fear, needs/WIIFM’s impact guide our actions – do we want to create a win? Or a lose for the other so WE don’t lose? Whoa! read that last sentence again: creating a lose for the other so we don’t lose (our identity!). Yikes, right?
Back to Identity BECAUSE our most IMPORTANT relationship is: ‘self’ relationship. Now, there’s so much talk about ‘self-care’ which often ties to good food, sleep, and a spa day. All those are important. AND: Mother Nature would define self-care as behavior that enhances your ‘win’. Win is ‘FIT’ for being and expressing your truest identity.
Show off your creativity: if you haven’t filled in this drawing – do it NOW!!!!
First and foremost – your ‘self’ relationship will guide every other relationship. Really examine:
What’s in your Identity ‘bag’? WHY do have the relationship you have with yourself?
Here’s a loose way to look at it: if I say I want to lose weight and then I eat a large bag of chips every night, my behavior is creating a ‘lose’. A small bag of chips a day or two a week, that is easily commensalism – more of a neutral. (The bigger question is WHY I’m creating a ‘lose’ but we have to wait for that one – though it’s related of course to needs and fears.)
‘Self’ relationship is as complicated as others. Here’s a view of the power of words creating a ‘win’ – and ‘lose’ relationship – with self.
Mutualism, creating win-win relationships in your life, starts with kindness to yourself.
Feeling bad? Acknowledge it, even if it’s to yourself. Express your feelings and fears – you’re allowed to have them and be hugged for having them.
Go back and define your identity like in the chart above.
Look in the mirror and tell yourself everything you do well and why you deserve to express your identity fully – from your DNA roots, to
Describe: How your appearance promotes (does it? If not what does it say about you?) your identity and how you feel about yourself (if you have on something that makes you feel bad – take it off and give it away), and
Explain: Your niche/qualities and characteristics that make you feel happy because you know these qualities are important and you’re good at them whether others recognize them or not.
Start YOUR journey today if you haven’t already.
Uncover your identity find your best ‘FIT’ to create the ‘WIN’ self relationship you deserve.
Human Nature Concepts 